What happened to nice guys?
The answer is simple: you did.
See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were fucking treated you.
At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and forced your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.
Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship.
So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the dating scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"
Well, once again, you did.
You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an asshole than he ever wanted to be.
Fact is, now, he's probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.
So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:
1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.
I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.
If you were five years younger.
So, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you've fucked yourself over. You're getting older, after all. It's time to excise the bullshit and deal with reality. You didn't want a nice guy then, and he certainly doesn't fucking want you, now.
Sincerely,
A Nice Guy
Random moments
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Welcome to the new year!
So it is now 08 and the holiday season was ok not too much to say i got a job and havent spent much time blogen plan on posten more soon.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Weird day
So yesterday was one of those days that usualy are packed full of fun bad stuff it started off kinda nice went and hung with old friends and went back to the school to be pounded with stupid highschool drama and then was stuck at the school till like 5pm and then my watch broke then well basicly the rest of the nite was mild but then i get home to find a stray cat had come in to my house and decided it wanted to lay on my bed as it was dying and pealed rotten skin and fur on to my bed at first i thought it was dead but it was still alive so i put it outside with a cat bed so it could pass comforbly and had to spend like 2 hours disinfecting and cleaning my bed and hands. yay
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Im back
Well i am doin ok i have been working on fixing my intropersonal problems and my issues i have, i got blocked for suspition of spam blogging but they finaly have set me free to blog once agin.
Friday, October 19, 2007
long nights
The time ticks as my mind clicks the hours long but short time seems to flow faster slower on and on till i am no longer needing the nights rest. Cant stop thinking about the things in the world that i will have to work on and cant stop trying to solve problems like chess i want to know 5 steps ahead but stuck on the current move.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
This existence
I sit here lost
i have cast of my shackles of life
and find to no evade
i help others to cast there's aside
and find joy
i escape the worlds bindings
and find more then i desired
i defeat all who oppose me
and am conquered by those whom loved me
i sit in my cell of darkness
only to break free to find
all was at no means for i had done nothing
but i had done everything
to no evale i had quested to find
something that wasn't there
but was known to be
in success i have failed
for there is no more but a tale.
This existence
i have cast of my shackles of life
and find to no evade
i help others to cast there's aside
and find joy
i escape the worlds bindings
and find more then i desired
i defeat all who oppose me
and am conquered by those whom loved me
i sit in my cell of darkness
only to break free to find
all was at no means for i had done nothing
but i had done everything
to no evale i had quested to find
something that wasn't there
but was known to be
in success i have failed
for there is no more but a tale.
This existence
Right now
Life is boring in the small town ok kelso longveiw as the days turn short and the nights grow long the air becomes crisp and the grass grows stiff. This desolate town we live in grows worse by the day with the infectuse alternatives and the rampant ailments to the young this is the town we live in and it is done. If change cant happen soon the town will surly be gone, with the random post of a random note i start my host of many post's.
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